i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
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