Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
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and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
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Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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