how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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