Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
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