I think i sorta joined a cult last night
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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