There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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