Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize