your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
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