that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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