FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
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