Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
