Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
