...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
