I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
