dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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