You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
