is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
