Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I wish I only lived at night.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
