Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Randomize
