Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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