my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I'm determined to sit on that face.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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