Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize