im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I need water and some morals
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
