Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
