Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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