I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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