I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
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