you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
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I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
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Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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