Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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