Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
