I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize