So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize