i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
