So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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