So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
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