1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
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