But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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