I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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