I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
