I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
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