I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize