he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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