Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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