I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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