Don't you send me to vm
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize