Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
