How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize