I like to think it a success when the cops are called
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
