fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
ugly people sure do ruin things
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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