whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
