I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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