Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize
